I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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