are you still at the devil's house?
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
