i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
