my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Randomize
