Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Randomize