i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
