I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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