and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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