I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
