So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Randomize
