it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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