I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize
