I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize