Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
