So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
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She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
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So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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