i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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