he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
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