R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
