what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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