it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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