I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
