I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Everclear isn't food dammit
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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