Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
