noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
