i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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