nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
