I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
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