That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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