when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
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It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
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Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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