yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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