New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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