guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize