Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
