Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
