that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
