You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I can't turn off my feet"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
