Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize