Hey man sorry I got all grabby
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize