He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
