She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
