Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I don't deserve a penis
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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