She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
