He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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