I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize