I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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