were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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