hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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