hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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