We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I'm at about main and main street
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
