Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
